number 165 jonny bulldozer

when your phone rings at 3am and it is a blocked number on a sunday night, usually it involves drunk overseas friends or drama - so i answered.

'hello is this ana?' a male voice said in a french accent...'yes' i answer...i really wish i could remember the whole conversation, because it was bend over backwards funny, but i was half asleep. last year i went through a stage of getting prank calls at similar times in the early morning. one of them involved a quiz, where i was to choose between contestants, 1, 2, or 3.

contestant 1 - was a 23 year old that like to cook sausages and smoke weed
contestant 2 - was a 21 year old that was unemployed but rode a skateboard
contestant 3 - was a 25 year old that was at uni and did something else that i can't really remember.

they all had a few other incredible attributes, but again i can't remember due to the time of the call. i went for contestant number one for old times sake - which proved to obviously be the right answer to the caller, because of hysterical high pitched laughing (from what sounded like not just 1, but multiple young males), as a result of my choice. when i asked 'how many people am i actually talking to, because, the person who now wants to know what i am doing at 2.10am sounds quite different to the quiz host?' more hysterical laughter, and then 'bahhhhhhhaaaaaa it's a 3 way ana - do you know what that is???' i could go so many ways with that question, so i thought what the heck 'why don't you come and show me...' somehow i don't think they were expecting that answer...phone slammed down. i go back to sleep.

so last nights call was sort of along those lines, but had a little more structure to it. i did check this morning to see if i had dreamt the whole thing, and there is a 4 minute phone conversation from a private number at 3am listed.

when i asked 'who is this', john answered...i was like 'john hey? i don't know if i know any john's but you do kind of sound familiar, could you give me some more information about yourself john...' 'did you call me asian?' john answered, 'no john i simply asked for some more INFORMATION about you as i can't really place you.' the french accent had slipped back to some sort of very youthful sydney tone at this stage, but then was right back on when he answered 'my name is jonny bulldozer,' 'oh right jonny bulldozer, still not coming to mind but anyway' i answer....this went on with me laughing at the silences in the conversation as jonny was obviously trying to think of what to come up with next.

'so are you going to tell me anything else or is that all jonny?' jonny responded that he was getting on his bulldozer as we were clearly wrapping this 3am conversation up and i didn't really think there were going to be any dirty innuendo's thrown my way, so i ask 'what are you going to do with that bulldozer jonny?...'

'I AM GOING TO RAM IT UP YOUR ASS, is what i am going to do with that bulldozer of mine!!!' slam down phone.

wowza's - i need to get up on the old prank phone call front, or maybe practise my street fighter tactics.